the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
It wasn't until that morning that I realized I wasn't actually dreaming, finding myself in the bathtub with someone laying on me
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
This is final. The chair stays in the bathroom, we are too old to be puking from the floor, grown ups sit in chairs infront of the toilet to puke.
Or grown ups don't drink themselves into vomiting.
On a toatally unrelated note, I see music in my hair
It's like Jesus got stoned and this would be the sandwiches he'd make
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
I'm trying to find some better sex background music so his neighbors don't hate us. This is tedious.
I think the highlight of my night is when I was eating a mayonnaise sandwich. drunk me was on point.
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
WE ARE DOING DRUGS AND GOING TO THE STRIP CLUB SATURDAY LADIES
I know I may be showing my age by saying this but this is the first time I have been eaten out in the parking lot behind the Clairmont Inn since 1990
Randomize
