My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Just bought a 17 year old 40's while wearing a poncho. This behavior is acceptable until I'm 25.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
Plan: drunk dancing. Reality: drunk almost getting in fights with people that could beat me into the ground.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
Its like he woke the dragon, and the dragon is hungry for a good dick.
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
do you know of a way I can die but like NOT die? like not being unconcious, just ascending to an astral plane for a few weeks or months in real world time so i can sort my issues out away from the rigors of life kinda deal, you know?
I don't really care where everyone ended up, but is everyone alive and not in jail?
Not in jail
Alive?
I have never been that aroused while laughing my ass off in my life
Randomize
