When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Just got roadhead in a driving snowstorm. That shit should be a Winter X games event.
Somehow I gave him blood blisters on his dick...I don't know if I'm that good or that bad.
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I got the number from the girl at uhaul even after she saw me throw up all over the parking lot with a 6 pack in my hands.
He just told me the blow job I gave him was like a journey
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
So I hooked up with a guy with a mustache and woke up on a dragon futon underneath a dragon yin-tang tapestry... My life is spiraling in a weird way.
Good because ass is like 60% of my diet now
this one kid was speed-mumbling about putting broccoli in the printer
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
Randomize
