How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
he threw up all over himself while laying down.. it was like watching old faithful, but with noodles and vodka
Well I say she's a whore. All four of her kids have different last names.
BUT, one is Johnson and the other is Johnston. She gets some credit for that
Bookstore boy and I went out, he came back here and I tried to fool around and he respects me too much blah blah I'm a predator.
Just watered mom's plants with leftover mixed drinks full of Bacardi Silver. I'm such a good daughter.
I need to stop getting so excited when a guy unzips his pants and its bigger than my boyfriends. I look like a kid in a candy store.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
How did it feel to just observe all the people blacking out usually you're on the other end of things
I felt like I was at the zoo
There's a stripper getting there at 10 though so hopefully I'm out before the stripper gets there. I don't have time to deal with a stripper.
I'm only fucking women born in the 90s this summer
Why the HOLY HELL is my dog on my roof??? Sam?? Why is the dog wearing my pants
He put rainforest music on before we had sex I felt like I was in the Amazon
I shouldn't have to tell you to stop throwing knives at me.
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