Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
This might sound awkward, but can I borrow a dildo for class?
He came on my face. Threw a towel at me. Stole my weed. And left. I thought this would be over after we graduated?
Someone asked me why we were having sex on the porch last night. All I remember is him saying he wanted the recruits to see. This has got to stop.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I consider my hand a solid 5. So if I'm dipping below a 7.5, I might as well go with old faithful.
After the first time we had sex he kept saying "I'm proud of you" over and over again
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
Randomize
