You're not pinnochio. Lying isn't going to make it bigger.
you made pancakes with beer, you said they were good. then you threw up 15 minutes later
Did you know the Dallas Cowboy cheerleaders have an exercise show ON Demand? Yeah, I had a lonely night
or how I got to mom's but there is vomit on my shoes. I never thought i'd be recapping with her.
two fat guys on crotch rockets just invited me to 'party' with them at a del taco. why does this keep happening to me?
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
Btw...pregnancy boobs are amazing. I don't recommend pregnancy in general but the boobs are good.
There's some drunk girl alone in the field, she looks like she could use some help.
Also it's only fair that you know that that girl is me.
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
When he pulls out of you and farts and says ahh I wanted to do that for the past 30 mins ....you rethink the next drunken hook up
I have cobwebs on my vagina for halloween. And bats fly out when I open my legs.
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
He had a step stool to get in to his bed!
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
Randomize
