I needed to borrow my dads nail clippers and next to it was an industrial size box of condoms if that wasnt bad enough I dropped the clippers behind the bed and discovered hundreds of used condoms
I'm getting drunk watching the disney channel. Is this a main reason why we aren't together anymore?
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
halloween is the only time that anne boleyn, the joker, a cowgirl, and a mexican man complete with sombrero and poncho can all hit the same blunt
I want to break his glasses with my pelvis.
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
You are the only person I know who has a fierce hatred for a five year old. Not even five year olds in general, yours is very specific
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I just got home and spray-tanned my boyfriend. That's the side of relationships they don't tell you about...
I need to leave my mind and my stupid vagina are having fight over who's right
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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