I'm going to email her once I get off the bathroom floor
the lighter is IN the bong. I don't know what to do
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
Got hereat 8. Had 6 beers 2 shots and a game of diZZY BATOS
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I got carried to one bar. Got a piggy back ride to the next bar. I was just testing our drinking team for st pattys day to make sure they are able to handle me more drunk than that.
no im not bringing booze its easy, you just challenge a drunk guy to beer pong, he'll hand you two beers, you lose on purpose, and everyone makes fun of you. but we laugh in the end for bringing nothing to a byob
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
WTF DUDE?
Stay calm. I'm sure there's a heterosexual explanation for this
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
I just had a sex dream about orange juice, so there's that.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
is it sad that a disney movie is making me horny?
Worst sex ever! He was a talker for sure! I was on top and out of no where he said "Oh you bad bitch?" I stopped and left.
Randomize
