hey in girl talk does "want to come over tonight and have some beers with me?" mean i want wiener?
I said ACK before Andy Samberg made it even remotely funny. That tool is stealing all my lines.
Yeah, you've definitely been jizzing in your pants years before he made it socially acceptable
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
According to google history I spent most of last night trying to buy an elephant.
Please tell me why 'cock-a-thon' was auto saved in my phone.
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
This would be a good time to bring up the fact that my spider-man fork is MIA
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I know I've wanted to fuck him for the past month, but when you're that hungover, the only chemistry you have is with a pillow and a gallon of water.
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
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