it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
Charles is a playa. And I don't mean the spanish word for beach.
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
had a guy just try to take his underwear off in the middle of the bar w o taking his pants off. That kind of Sunday afternoon
That penis you're staring at is the penis of heartbreak. Stay away. It will break your heart AND keep you away from other penises. BACK. OFF. THE PENIS.
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I've been drunk in my life. But I've never been "crying in 5 Guys at 1 in the afternoon" drunk
After Madison dropped a bottle of full vodka an it shattered on the floor, it was quiet for literally 3 min straight and then drew said "the booze gods have spoken"
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I should make a collage of all the pictures of me caught doing slutty things
She started giving me head while we were watching the Walking Dead premiere, WORST BJ EVER.
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
Let me set the mood for you. Do you remember Britney Spears in her Hit Me Baby One More Time era? Well I just fucked this college girl I shit you not her name is Persephone and she looks exactly like Britney Spears back when she was hot. I might be in love.
Randomize
