Apparently I look legit enough, cause the 3 bums next to me just got kicked awake by cops, and I was allowed to stay sitting here. That's a plus, right?
I rubbed one out into an envelope and mailed it to her. Game point, I win.
He looked way older than 15. He probably thought that since I have braces I was 15. Fuck. The 6 year age gap is never to be spoken about. Especially because what happened constitutes as illegal.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
just went to the store to buy a mop & tampons. i feel like i just gave in to all those women jokes.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
I'm sick of being broke. I had vicodin and frosting for lunch.
The guys had to come into the bar bathroom and pep talk us all off the floor
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
So the drug dealer I'm sleeping with just got drugs from the other drug dealer I'm sleeping with
Isn't life beautiful?
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
WHY DIDN'T YOU INVITE ME TO RUN THROUGH TACO BELL'S SPRINKLERS AT 4AM?!
I feel strange, like something is off with my body
Yeah that's called sobering up, we've been drunk for the past 4 days
hooking up with him was much more fun when i knew in the back of mind we'd get in some sort of trouble for it
Still fucking the ballerina?
She can put her legs behind her head.
Enough said
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