Also my back is semi rug burned and I'm holding you fully responsible.
I would love to give you more rug burn
JoAnns office is warmer than mine. . .it must be because she has the gateway to hell under her desk.
an ex called crying about her current BF. convo ended in phone sex. i love emotional wrecks
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
As I was leaving the drunk tank the cop told me he had a feeling we would be meeting again real soon.
I know I know. I considered playing it sober but after I typed out IS SHE A GENIE? I knew it was impossible to hide.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
All I wanted was a "this is what America feels like" blowjob before I left. Is that too much to ask for?
He wouldn't give me a cup of water for my bong so i sat in the drive thru to run up the timer until he gave it to me.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
Two questions. One. Where are you watching election results tomorrow? Two. Can we have Obama victory sex?
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
It's a gay bachelor party, it's not like dignity is to be expected
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
Randomize
