There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
Well I don't think you could recreate that hangover if you tried. It was like the perfect storm of hangovers.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Just made gatorade. in the bathtub.
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
You made a "martini" bagel. Took a bagel dunked it in vodka and put olives in it
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
i ran into my coworkers when i was walking home last night. i was shirtless. i think i gave my shirt to Walter. he's a cat.
im still drunk. birthday week begins.
I wanted to make fun of someone saying that to an untrained ear, skrillex is blah blah blah. But it was too soon after they said it. And now I can't find it. These are real problems.
Yea not today, I ending up taking a shit behind a tree last night.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
I can recall having this conversation with a three year old, but go on
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