This is much more drunk than i was intending for a wednesday
She said she didn't want to have sex because she was so torn up about "this whole NBC thing."
You watched "From Justin to Kelly" and sang along to more than half of the songs. I didn't know whether to laugh or to be insanely frightened that you knew almost all the lyrics.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
I got a Cease & Desist email from NBC for downloading Bruno. I am not going down for gay porn.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
In other news my cocaine dealer got arrested for heaving some kid out of a fourth story window.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
She came into the salon and said, "Don't judge me. Yes that's cum in my hair and I want a shampoo, cut and style."
I like your optimism Chelsea but I'm not about getting my salad tossed
Sustenance and doggy style.. the only two things I need
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