I like how you formally end text interactions, just turn your phone off or don't respond you pervert
I hate bills.
Like ones you have to pay or people named William?
would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
cynthia nixon should never get laid more than me
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
I have only been in this city 3 nights and there are already 4 bars I can never go back to again.
the outcome of this sandwich determines whether or not i do anything else with my day..
He never gives up. He's like the fucking little engine that could of hook ups
I never thought I would have to get vodka suctioned out of my ear
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
If you don't believe in my fighting skills, I don't know if we can be together
ok first of all what the fuck
Randomize
