i mean i cnt help that this campus has the highest STI rate
drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Tonight i am praying for god to turn my pussy into apple pie because i cant count the number of times bruce chooses food over sex.
you tried to tell me that ice cream had no calories because they were "frozen"
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
He handled me like a finger puppet on crack... Time to ice the vagina, I'd like to sit down sometime today.
UPDATE: WE WILL BE HITTING THE BATMAN PINATA WITH A SWORD
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
I fingered myself to realization that I don't need birth control if there is never a guy.
if there is one thing you splurge on it better be nice condoms
Leave it to you to bring a trash can into a fist fight.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
Randomize
