margs and chips and queso make the world go round
well and inertia
another moral hangover. fuck.
Yeah but his hole really smells sometimes
Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
My broken door handle makes it really inconvient for when i need to puke at red lights.
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
cant tell, his cock is acting like one of those inflatable arm waving things outside the market
Happy cinco de mayo!! Puke filled sombrero in the lawn needs to be picked up and whos never punched my fence boards in half needs to replace those by the way the owner of those panties (see attached photo) anytime you wanna cum over;-) hiii!
So here's a brief summary of my weekend: last night I drank four glasses of Death Punch, grabbed the toaster, said "This is mine", put it in my pants and walked out the front door.
I'm actually kinda upset that we didn't consider velcro-ing detachable capes to our clothes before this moment.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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