You rolled out of the car, got on all fours and puked then just nonchalantly stood up and waved goodbye and thanks for the ride.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
sitting alone on a bench with a sombrero and a bottle of vodka. really angry i got here before you guys.
nothing like going to the bathroom, running into the wall, thinking its a person and saying"its ok i just had the 4 beers" even the wall knew i was lying
Great news I took pics last night
Warning: most of them are of you peeing while I take selfies
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Never thought having a box of Cheerios could get me laid. My new lucky charm hello girl in 2B
when I type Christina's, my phone's predictive text assumes my next word is boobage
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
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