i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Dude I just heard my boss singing from the bathroom "I love making poop"
so i walk in and shes blowing her vag with a hair dryer. so i asked what she was doing, she said heating up supper.. come eat ;)
i'm so jealous of you right now.
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.
OMG the post office opened my dildo! "we sincerely regret the damage to your package"
So getting a bj to I believe I can fly is one of the greatest things ever
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
I just bought $54 in Easter crap to try and blend in the pregnancy test... And FYI, it totally worked.
It was close. I was the girl scoping out where all the garbage cans were located in the class just in case.
This is why you don't heavily drink before 2 midterms.
I can't wait till they start promoting the testiciplasty. Turn those old prunes into fresh tight kiwis!
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
Randomize
