He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
While I was banging her, her cell rang. She checked to see who it was, answered it, and moaned, "I'm dumping you."
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Found out why they call her Halfpipe Jenny-NOT the cool reason we thought
Leave the bottle at home cause either way I'm not taking another shot. You have no idea how long it took me to compose this text free of grammatical error.
Gold star for you, but I'm on my way and the soco is buckled in next to me. This is happening.
Psh a bachelors degree is the new adulthood. We're all just pretending anyways. I'm sitting on my boyfriends couch while he's passed out drunk. In my lap. On a Wednesday. And he's a nurse. See, pretending to be an adult
I'm gonna drop in for a zip later man. It made me wanna eat my girls shampoo. Good shit
I'll answer your question with a question: Are you gonna be too high?
Thank you for FINALLY joining the Slutasorus Rex club in this conversation.
Easter bunny might get some gnarly munches and not even have enought candy left to hand out
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
I rode home in a shopping cart so there's that. MVP to the guy that pushed it.
I know you do it only because of my toyota, but thank you for fucking me. Seriously.
It’s only loud for those who wanna get loud. The bowlers are protected.
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