Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
dude stop sending me pictures of your dick in weird places. i get it. you rock out with your cock out.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I apologize for forcing you to look at my boob when we were high. It was uncalled for
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
He made me cum 7 times AND I nearly drowned him during that 69 in the back of a ford focus. Yeah I should get my gynocologist.
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
He just started dry humping the air... I'm done
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
location: under the moon. please find me. need ride home.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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