Our friend ended up naked, bleeding, requesting we throw a couch at him cause he was convinced he could block it
We did he did.
When I say naked, I mean penis exposed. Not in boxers
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
If i spent $300 & took that thing home i would hate myself today.
Am I allowed to say that I would really enjoy blowing you again? Or does that fall into the "nothing changes between us" catagory?
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
i'll probably be on drugs forewarning
forewarning i'll probably have done those drugs with you
I clipped one of my extensions in his hair to give him a rat tail. What is my life?
Apparently I've told this bouncer I stalk him on Instagram 3 times. I should stop drinking. I only remeber saying it tonight. early sign of Alzheimer's
He asked me if my princess crown was real and before I could say yes, he was already reaching to put it on. I'm pretending I'm asleep if he tries to have sex.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
I was driving around a golf cart with a keg in the back before I got caught by the cops. First slow speed chase ever
Was i rolling around in a parking lot last night
Randomize
