Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
No one actually likes Tequila. They just accept it as a fact of life. Like hpv.
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
I'll have to explain it to you tonight when i call drunk. It will sound better
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
How do you get kicked out of 3 different Subways in one night..
Not very gracefully, that's how.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
I'm taking a pole dancing class this morning. Can I put you down as my emergency contact? I'm NOT putting my mother
You should've seen the look on the guys face when I demanded pho and a beer the second they opened. Obviously he doesn't understand hangovers
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