he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
You named all of the cocktail shrimps and then tackled a guy for "eating Henry"
Its 4 am and he honestly tried throwing pizza at his ceiling for decorations
reaaaally cool. my cat ate my birth control.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
Like do you realize his dealer came out with a gun and we laughed like it was all just fun and games...
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
So after taking my shirt off, he pulls my bra off like a hockey jersey. FUCKIN PRO. Guy knew what he wanted.
I should come with a warning like "do not feed me tequila or cocaine, I will ruin the party and cry"
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
I got wing sauce on the baby and licked it off. If you were wondering how I'm doing.
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
Randomize
