oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
I'm pretty sure he came before I knew he was inside me.. Didn't think that was his plan when he said he was gonna do things I've never experienced before
His shopping cart was nothing but malt liquor and zucchini.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
He went down on me and then slapped my ass saying "thanks for the confidence boost"... is this all I'm good for?
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
I recommend just blowing him. It's always the way to go.
she's doing key bumps of parmesean cheese
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I feel like there should be a database and you screen your boyfriend's scrotum and all the fucked up shit they've done goes on file.
I walked by the two of them and mouthed "fuck me" based on there reaction I think they just came in their pants
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
Randomize
