Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
thus making me awesome and them whores
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Well my dea agent brother is visiting so I'm gonna get high and see if he notices
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
He just laughed at his drink laid on the floor and crawled to the bathroom
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
I will take a blow job from a dude that kinda looks like a girl at this point
I want to own their dicks and all the attachments
I dunno what the deal was, but you spent about an hour trying to put your phone charger in the outlet and you were yelling "one plug to rule them all"
I would do everything over again, except the fireball.
So besides your brother walking in on you shaving and singing "I'm gonna get asssss" how was your night
He just brought a live lobster to the party.
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
