I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Her idea of kinky involved a tazer
wtf?
I'm going back tonight
HIS TAN HAS PUT ME TO SHAME. HE TOOK HIS PANTS OFF AND HIS DICK LOOKED LIKE A GHOST
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
i dont think sending her flowers will make her forgive you running over her foot.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
You want further proof that God hates me? Okay. We're on the way to the ER. A homeless man stabbed me at the gas station.
Last thing I remember at your house last night is your dad leaning on the beer pong table and saying "you guys can fucking party"
oh he pulled my dick out. wanna come over after he leaves
GET OFF YOUR PHONE
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