too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
No period for spring break; use this wisely.
Made a joint out of my Yale rejection letter. Life is grand.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
SARAH B AND I ARE GOING TO GO HALFSIES AND BUY YOU A CAT. IS THAT OKAY. TO KEEP YOU COMPANY DURING THUNDERSTORMS SUCH AS THIS ONE. ITS BECAUSE WE LOVE YOU.
Gave him an awesome blow job on his living room couch last night, so at least he'll have something nice to think about next time he's watching the Tigers lose.
the cops accepted 42 wallaby way Sydney. and the cops, and cab driver accepted the new address. please tell the win i am experiencing
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
I was like can I please fuck your hips back into realignment
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
I have a mailbox and I don't know why.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
