all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
So a sorority girl just introduced herself to me by saying "a guy I used to fuck just threw up on me" and then she grinded on me
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
Why did I puke in my shower caddy last night
She wants to go furniture shopping for memorial day so we've gotta go portable
thermos full of jaeger bombs?
Affirmative
my phone went off during the middle of it and he ask what i was doing. he wouldn't let my reply with "your boss". ..
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
He asked when the last time I had sex was. I had to look at the clock and respond "12 hours ago"
skyped with him for 45 min in the bath while i shaved my legs. new level in the relashionship
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
