question: masturbation: how much is too much? I think i'm about to tip toe a fine line
There need to be more gay people on my afternoon soaps.
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
I think he's in need of mouth to penis resuscitation. Which I happen to be certified
Balls are being tripped. Said meow to my cat and he said yeah cool dude.
Can we pretty pretty please go to Mardi Gras tomorrow? I promise I'll be a good girl and not puke in a pledges car
I haven't been hungover in so long I'm actually looking forward to it
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
I'm disappointed in the internet. It's two days and there's still no fanfiction based off that Manning/Beckham commercial.
You don't even like football
Last time I was blackout at Cowbells I was running around screaming “WHERES THE BLOOOWWWW”
It's a charity event and she's wearing a cocktail dress drinking a 40... I found my future wife
My FIANCE just told me he thought you were the prettiest out of all my friends YOU WHORE
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