Just farted in public and tried to sniff it all up before anyone noticed...do you think that actually works?
I want to apologize 3 days in advance for what's about to take place on St. Patrick's day.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
I cannot even describe to you the most amazing ass I have ever had the pleasure of seeing walk up the stairs in front of me just now.
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
That accounts for only three of the penises
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
It's called hot rabbit the party if he asks the password is "careful" don't ask
Lesson learned:nothing good comes from an at home wax kit.
I need to stop agreeing to hang out with people when I'm drunk.
I walked out and he was covered in jelly, slithering around the floor. I don't know how to process that.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
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