So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
this is never going to happen for me, I think he thinks I'm crazy
well you did scream "PLEASE! I'LL S YOUR D IN FRONT OF EVERYONE"
The view from the bathroom floor this morning is fabulous
He couldn't say anything coherently but shot off a perfectly timed "that's what she said" when michelle said he'd have to ride in the trunk because she didn't have enough room up front.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
So this bar tattoo not looking that great now
Also, sorry about chilling in just the towel last night. You know I have ADD and somehow even after looking at you, I forgot I'm not the only person living there right now
I'm still me, I just happen to have things in my porn library that you may not have expected
Only you would come out as bi like that
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
We had to push you home in an abandoned shopping trolley. You thought you were in a pirate boat and kept yelling "AVAST, ME HEARTIES".
I am listening to Jack Johnson and wearing the sweater your Mother made me fuck mother nature I am in my happy place right now
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