I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
so they are in my phone as twin 1 and twin 2. but i forget which is which. did i put them in order of who I hooked up with first, or who is sexier? cause i'm not trying to text the one with the girlfriend
1st off, theyre identical. 2ndly, have i ever told you that youre a huge slut? hope that helps
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
I don't care if its bassically 3rd world. A country without a drinking age is a country without a drinking age.
i just dedicated my kegstand to your breasts
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
As an added bonus, you will have a "25 blowjobs a month" voucher, expiring thirty days after the first initial bj.
hoooly shit dude in taco costume challenged alpha douche to a fight. he's got catch phrases. come. now.
i think the sex is so good because i get a contact high just from fucking him
Final Summary: could he eat a lit sparkler? Probably. Could he do it while peeing off the roof? I'll tell you when you get to the ER.
The night got interesting when the random guy next to us handed us a bottle of champagne and the rest of his ciroc bottle. When we asked why he did it, he proceeded to point at his friend who face planted the floor.
You can't just snapchat me a picture of a pregnancy test and then not answer your phone
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I haven't been dieting for my entire life to date some guy who thinks his dad bod is a riot.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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