She looked like cheddar but tasted like limburger...
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
eating taco bell the same day as formal = probably a bad idea
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
She gave me a BJ with my hoodie on. it was like i was blowing myself.
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
Last two new years I ended in jail by 12. Can we wait until its actually 12:02 this time to do something stupid. I'd like to spend the first minute of 2012 free.. At least.
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
You have like just as much sex as me and I have a brand new bf. That does not add up. That is not right.
I felt so bad but my urge to be with you & drunkenly eat your face was apparently much stronger.
I tried eating pop-rocks while giving him a bj, I honestly think I was more disappointed with the results than he was.
Randomize
