and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
I have sucked so much dick this week I think I am going to start sweating semen
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
YOUR BALLS CAME OUT. DONT CALL ME A SHITSHOW.
My cat was watching porn with me. Weirdest bonding experience ever.
Drinking vodka and pirating music in the library. Welcome to finals week.
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
K. The dog and I are outside. The Uber driver said "I hope he fucks the shit out of you"
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
You’ll (maybe) appreciate that I picked at my ingrown hair again. Quarantine updates are getting BLEAK.
Randomize
