The night began with "let go home early so we can study for my 9am final" and ended with "show me your boobs for a free pack of gum".My breasts are worth 14 sticks for a dollar.
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
no, I didn't make it. Instead, i watched VH1 for... 13 hours? I use the question mark because I was using Flavor Flav's clocks to tell time after the first 3 hours.
Her little brother was home, so we had to hook up while playing hide and seek with him
I need a creepy friend to scare off the other creepy people
I would be honored to be that friend.
I just told someone i was in "addition and subtraction 160".......and they believed me.
is 69 when you're sideways or up & down? I was on my back & confused.
Why is your signature on my underwear?
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
A Bum and I jusst hugged. its not even 8 pm.
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
btw my ex came by last night and saw the pregnancy test intructions. awkwarrrrd.......
I snapchatted him 4 pictures of me as Tarzan's dad so if he never talks to me again at least we'll know why
i literally have the attention span of a weasel on steroids, but yeah, i know who you’re talking about.
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