i met a boy and i'm in lovvvvveeeeeeee and we're going to vegas and getting marrrrrriiiieeeeedddddd!
let's be honest with each other here, that's about the worst idea you've ever had. you need to walk this one off.
We need to rekindle our bromance
just found his boxers balled up inside my tights, hidden in my freezer. damn i love college.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Her boyfriend only talks to me because I know her period schedule
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
Me and allie were just offered cocaine by a strange man in a women's bathroom. Why have I not lived in Austin my whole life?
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
I felt guilty, it was so good!
Guilty? Oh great, I give the Jewish mother-in-law of blowjobs.
Just cried watching Wimbledon, worst comedown ever.
I mean...he danced with his dick still inside of me. What more could a girl ask for?
It's just not St. Patrick's Day until someone pukes on your panties.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
