two drunk chicks are talking to me about reinacting 2girls1cup
ill bring the camera dont start without me
Waldo just asked us for directions. Even he doesn't know where he is.
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
just mapquested my walk of shame from saturday..bye bye freshman 15
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
I feel like death crawled up inside me and died. That sick
You've never sent a girl a dick pic?
Call me old fashioned
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Simultaneously sexting while making brunch plans. Multitasking at its gayest.
I'm more heavily invested in that tequila than you are
how do you feel about japanese?
I would eat half a street meat hotdog I found on the sidewalk, I'm good with anything.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
I’m not saying you’re wrong, I’m just saying he’s denying what you’re saying.
Randomize
