I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
We name dropped you at the liquor store and got a ten percent discount!
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
You hopped on the counter after puking, and told us you were wearing bare feet and didn't want to be alone.
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Time is so short and I miss you. (I just watched that commercial where the people all laugh and get older and die.)
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
I'm going to try and loofah my hangover away.
Update: It didn't work
Can’t. It’s taco and dick night.
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