You drinking a lot?
No.
Define a lot
Don't go all Obama on me. George Bush this decision and just do it. Thinking's for the morning after
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
dude are you gonna smoke tonight? my day was shit and I wanna get high
worker bees can leave....even drones can fly away....the queen is their slave
nevermind....I'm on the way
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Your headphones are on the door knob and I left you a burger on the door step.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
I asked Tony because I knew he wouldn't give me a lecture about consequences
???? Tony IS a lecture about consequences
Oh man
I hooked up with the lead singer of the band at the wedding. I am so hungover.
I just fell and sprained my ankle in the shower. No, I wasn't having sex. I was doing the time warp. Again.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
Ever look at an ex and wonder...was I drunk that entire relationship??
Yes, yes I do.
Randomize
