Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
I just saw a sign that said "STRIPPERS!!! As seen on Jerry Springer!". As if Springer is the highest honor. I'm pretty sure we're in south Georgia.
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
I think I may have walked up to her while she was with her friends and asked for a "do over".
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
It's all a blur. I just remember holding some strangers baby
Yah. Thai people are way too trusting
I don't need my coworkers thinking I'm a nutcase.
You gift wrapped a tampon.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
Charles Manson is Getting Married and I stare down at my tits and wonder how I am possibly single.
Pretty sure the cop told you that you were the first person he pulled over for being drunk on a tractor. So there's that.
Fuck this. I'm adopting 12 cats and naming them after the 12 disciples. Maybe Jesus will have sympathy for me then.
I gave him one of my famous hand jobs.
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