I just rolled a joint with a page from On The Road by Kerouac. I have never felt like more of a hipster.
my nick name has gotton too long over the years..C.T.P.S.G.F.P.G.......cock tease private school groupie frat party groupie.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Nothing says "I forgive you for puking on me during sex" like a Facebook add the next morning...
This weekend is gunna be a fucking shitshow. I don't even wanna know how many dicks will end up inside of me
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
How are ur friends?
One is peeing in the grass and the other is asleep under the stairs. Fuck them I'm sleeping in the car
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
She's takin more dicks this month than I have in my life by the sounds of it
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
Randomize
