It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
Medicore although I woke up with the business card of a Turkish lawyer called Mufasa...
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I have to fuck proof my bed. It was in the middle of the room this time.
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
I had to wash my hair with conditioner because my sister got hammered and gave the dog a 3am sprinkler bath with my shampoo.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
As i was laying there shouting that he dislocated my hip he actually reached his armed around and patted himself on the back
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
Just seen a chubby version of you. Nearly kidnapped her. Perfect woman
This is the third time my roommate and I have drunkenly hooked up. I'm starting to think she's not as straight as she says she is.
Randomize
