New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
It's not littering; it's giving birds nest building suplies. Besides, birds love soy sauce and plastic forks.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
Come over and help me clean up your so-called "winter wonderland" that you made with the fire extinguisher in the kitchen last night.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
I just horrified a large group of people. Congrats on dating me.
Haha, apparently they frown upon male strippers there. Bouncers couldn't catch me tho.
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
Have you ever come so hard that right after you have the urge to yell "make me a sandwich!"? ...I think my ovaries turned into testicles.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
So I thought you might like to hear how I went to sams club to print some pictures and suddenly there was 20 pictures of your dick and my snatch on the screen
I’m not spending 14 dollars on a margarita unless it’s rimmed with cocaine... actually do you have a blender?
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
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