I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
spring break forecast: sunny with a chance of shitshow
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
she is medically diagnosed as a nympho. she has the paper to prove it. hell. fucking. yeah.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
And before you get all mad cause I said "nipples," I actually discarded "you are so wet right now" and "you have such a raging clit-on right now."
That's called being sensitive.
I'm gonna make a mold of your dick so I can make popsicles
Oh, and I'm only keeping her around till spring. Doing the hunt for cunt is too tough in 12" of snow.
He's basically wearing those Nike boner sweatpants. It's hard not to jump him. How has your day been?
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
So worth it. Come over for bacon egg cheese vusquit later. 12. I slept with Jimmy? On my period? And told him he had mother issues? No tequila. Tequila bad.
I thought you were dead but then you asked me if your tits looked good. They did.
Randomize
