Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Brandy, I need a picture of your boobs. Not time to explain.
we went back to her place to bone only to find her boyfriend having sex.. with MY girlfriend
You realize if you die tommorow, the last memory i'll ever have of you is your ballsack on skype
Need to stop getting stoned with this chick, I keep waking up covered in pizza sauce
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Dude I was taking a shower and I kept looking down at the drain expecting Mario to come up, yell "It's a me, Mario!", tickle my balls, and go back down the drain.
I've been trying to brush my teeth for 20 mins now... Mother of hangovers.
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
I don't know. Sometimes you can be a wild card with your emotions. Mostly the emotion known as anger.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
If we had a dog do you think we would be less hoe-y?
Nah
Like people our age are getting engaged, and I’m out here spooning with a giant unicorn I bought at Walmart on Black Friday.
Randomize
