I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
We had to leave. Dave knocked a dude out for saying yolo.
Can I bring home a duck? Dead serious
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I dont remember you getting a condom thrown at you. I think I had a concusion
so he'll eat food out of a dumpster but he won't lick your ass?
Randomize
