I un-blacked out around 7am watching J.lo videos on youtube
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
i don't remember but I assumed it was bad when I woke up with directions from his house to mine already pulled up on my phone
Recording ancient aliens and the third Reich. Stoned you will thank me later.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
does the cute hipster in the kitchen belong to you?
if not i want to bang those glasses off his face
Is it bad that I'm a 32 year old woman that is so afraid of commitment that a hamster is too much responsibility?
Quick how do you hit on a guy in the car behind you? It's important.
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
Well. I mean as excuses for running late go, 'losing track of time in the bathhouse' has gotta be up there on the top ten.
You were on the train yelling, "THIS TRAIN NEEDS TO GO FASTER SO I CAN GO HAVE SEX WITH MY BOYFRIEND!!!"
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
Randomize
