we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
vagina is talking i cant
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
every single kid we've ever known, every single person we've gotten blow jobs from, every single person we've hit home runs with... is at dennys right now
1 I really miss college walks of shame 2 I think I may have killed this girls cat
Honestly, I don't care if the only reason she gave me her beer was because she was bisexual and wanted to touch my vagina. Beer is beer.
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
I just caught myself watching and Irish step dance documentary in my underwear drinking nyquil through a straw at 2 in the afternoon. today's off to a good start.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
He's the conductor of the struggle bus
I RODE THAT FINE PIECE OF STRUGGLE BUS
You could woo kevin with a boquet of breakfast burritos. He loves those burritos. You could use the hot sauce packets like babies breathe
We accept all of your sexual lovers, Jewish, episcopalian, atheist. Dick is dick
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