Dear tim. Christina farted and it smells like kid roses.
just jacked off in the bed i was conceived in.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
i think the whole apartment complex could hear you beating off last night
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I was so high I told him we should rub faces and pretend to be wombats. He was surprisingly enthusiastic about it.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Some kid just popped open a giant PBR and walked into his final...
We fucked so hard that when I orgasmed I tore his towel rack off the wall. He was more impressed than mad.
You don't understand. On her lunch break she sits on the roof, stares into the sky, and chain smokes. I can't get on her level. She is made up of java monsters with whiskey and a voice that sounds like sex.
You need to stop crushing on your boss or fuck her.
Exactly best part of my night he took of his shirt and surprise traveler fanny pack
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
Definitely accidentally brought drugs into Disneyland. Considering using them.
Randomize
